Bullying online is often carried out by people you know and may be linked to \u201creal-world\u201d bullying, which might make you feel like there\u2019s no escape. Moreover, telling someone to just turn their phone off and ignore it is not very realistic. We all use technology for a variety of purposes, and especially at this time when we can\u2019t see our friends face to face, being able to use chat apps or social platforms is very important.<\/p>\n
We must be clear; bullying is never okay! There may sometimes be a catalyst for it, a fall out with a friend, or a disagreement over a sports game, but there is a difference between someone being mean or having an argument and bullying. Here are a few important things to know about bullying and how to deal with it:<\/p>\n
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- The definition of bullying<\/b> is \u201crepetitive and intentional hurting of one person or group by another person or group, where the relationship involves an imbalance of power.\u201d This means that you can\u2019t accidentally bully someone<\/em>! While it may feel unpleasant if someone is mean to you, bullying is a repeated behavior, not a one-off disagreement. This is a common misunderstanding\u2014for example, when we asked U.S. teens in a nationwide survey<\/a> what they consider to be bullying when playing online games, they named various behaviors that may or may not fall into this category:<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
![](\"https:\/\/arcader.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/bullying-prevention-month-helping-yourself.jpg\")
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- Power image<\/b>: The bully often yields power in the first instance. Sometimes they might be physically bigger, they might appear to be more popular or use others around them as back up, but actually, this power isn\u2019t always real. The people standing by the person bullying are often just too afraid to stand up to them. This doesn\u2019t make them \u201cpopular.\u201d Don\u2019t let the negativity they are imposing on you become your truth. You are equals.<\/li>\n
- Bullying behavior<\/b> is often targeted towards something very personal<\/b>\u2014your looks, personality traits, sexuality, or ethnicity, anything that the person bullying can use to hurt you. Remember that these exact things are what make each of us unique and interesting. They are not weaknesses; they are strengths. If you can start to see yourself in this way, it helps adjust that \u201cpower\u201d imbalance and the person bullying loses their strength.<\/li>\n
- Bullying is not a personality trait<\/b>, but rather a behavior that can change. Sure, some people can be unpleasant or mean, but sometimes people act out of character. People can and do change. We should encourage that!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
What You Can Do If You Experience Bullying<\/b><\/h2>\n
We spoke with the Roblox community and also got recommendations from experts at the global organizations like The Diana Award<\/a> and Project Rockit<\/a> that are focused on raising resilient digital citizens, providing resources, and training young people to stand up instead of standing by. Here are their top tips:<\/p>\n
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- Talk to someone about it.<\/b> This is the very first thing to do\u2014please never suffer in silence! There are people that can help you. Many will also have been through or are currently experiencing the same thing, so it can be very helpful to talk with them about their experiences. Alex Holmes, Deputy CEO at The Diana Award, an organization that provides resources and support for people who are experiencing bullying behavior, recommends: \u201cLet someone\u2014anyone\u2014know how you are feeling, sense check the situation by asking someone \u2018this just happened, what do you think\u2019? Often instead of worrying on your own you might get a different perspective or take on the situation which may lead to you feeling much better and lead to you feeling supported and valued.\u201d<\/li>\n
- If you find it really hard to speak to someone, try writing a message<\/b>. Holmes advises considering sending a text or an email or reaching out to an anonymous helpline or service for help. Some schools and colleges have anti-bullying ambassadors or peer support projects. You might even find it helpful to get involved yourself.<\/li>\n
- Find your allies<\/b>. <\/b>Lucy Thomas, one of the founders of Project Rockit, Australia\u2019s youth-driven movement against (cyber)bullying, notes that while it sounds obvious, sometimes we need to ask people to stand up for us online: \u201cThis doesn\u2019t mean picking a fight with the person who is giving you a hard time. Instead, they could try interrupting nasty comments with a distraction, or posting positive content to show they have your back. If your online opponent knows you have people on your side, they are less likely to continue hassling you.\u201d By the way, some good news here\u2014in a nationwide survey <\/a>of nearly 600 teens commissioned by Roblox last year, almost everyone (96%) said they\u2019re likely to help a friend they see being bullied online!<\/li>\n
- Don\u2019t let others take over your problem<\/b>. While it\u2019s important to seek help, another recommendation from The Diana Award expert is not to let others overtake your issue. Instead, you can say: \u201cI\u2019d like you to listen, and perhaps we can solve this together.\u201d Then come up with a strategy together that feels good to you.<\/li>\n
- Look after yourself<\/b>. <\/b>Bullying can take its toll on emotional wellbeing, so make sure you surround yourself with people you like and do things that make you happy. Also, look after the physical side; you need to eat well and sleep.<\/li>\n
- Use self-moderation tools<\/b> (where available) like block<\/a> and report<\/a> on Roblox, as recommended by our community saying: \u201cThese are powerful tools that give you back control. Make sure you know how to use them on all the apps and websites you use.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Finally, some words of support from Alex at The Diana Award:<\/p>\n
\u201cWhen someone treats you in the wrong way, it does affect our emotions, feelings, and mood,\u201d explains Holmes, adding that it\u2019s natural to feel upset or vulnerable, but that doesn\u2019t make you weak. \u201cWe should all try and remember the strength each and everyone has inside of us. The talent and skills you possess, the great friend you are to others, and the potential you have to make the world a better place. What\u2019s happening to you isn\u2019t okay but it doesn\u2019t define you, and things will get better.\u201d<\/p>\n
- If you find it really hard to speak to someone, try writing a message<\/b>. Holmes advises considering sending a text or an email or reaching out to an anonymous helpline or service for help. Some schools and colleges have anti-bullying ambassadors or peer support projects. You might even find it helpful to get involved yourself.<\/li>\n
- Bullying behavior<\/b> is often targeted towards something very personal<\/b>\u2014your looks, personality traits, sexuality, or ethnicity, anything that the person bullying can use to hurt you. Remember that these exact things are what make each of us unique and interesting. They are not weaknesses; they are strengths. If you can start to see yourself in this way, it helps adjust that \u201cpower\u201d imbalance and the person bullying loses their strength.<\/li>\n
- Power image<\/b>: The bully often yields power in the first instance. Sometimes they might be physically bigger, they might appear to be more popular or use others around them as back up, but actually, this power isn\u2019t always real. The people standing by the person bullying are often just too afraid to stand up to them. This doesn\u2019t make them \u201cpopular.\u201d Don\u2019t let the negativity they are imposing on you become your truth. You are equals.<\/li>\n